Joke

[agata_2000]

Top 10 Sarcastic Dares



Sarcastically speaking, I dare you to do some of the things found on my top ten list.
10. Pull into a gas station and use the window washer to wash your entire car.
9. Ask a bank teller to break a $100 bill for you. Then when asked how you want it done say, "in hundreds".
8. Call a political candidate's campaign office and ask them for a donation to your non-candidacAy.
7. Ask a security guard how it feels knowing that in all the action movies the security guards are always the first to die.
6. When you get credit card offers in the mail, stuff the prepaid envelopes with toilet paper and mail them back. (whether you use new or used toilet paper is totally up to you.)
5. Call your bank and ask them to add your checking account onto the $700 billion government bail out plan.
4. Find someone who is big into worrying about the threat of global warming, remind them of their own carbon dioxide and body heat contribution to the planet, and ask them to stop it.
3. Ask a judge if you can get away with murder as long as you can convince a jury of your peers ahead of time that it is justified.
2. Send a bill to every TV station, radio station, cell phone company, and satellite company, charging them an "access fee" for the waves they broadcast through your property. If they refuse payment, charge them with trespassing.
And the #1 Sarcastic Dare...
1. Circulate a petition to put "intelligent human beings" on the endangered species list.

[Arnyek2011]

INSTALLING SPRING...

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[Silvery997]

INSTALLING SPRING...

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Installation failed. Please try again. 404 error: Season not found.

Season "Spring" cannot be located. The season you are looking for might

have been removed, had its name changed, or is temporarily unavailable.

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LOL Very good, thank you (and true)

[nikya84]

[UsDie]

That is a topic, only for the english jokes?: )

[nikya84]

[perica6892]

Haha, great one!

[appaloosa]

Three elderly sisters, ages 92, 94 and 96, shared a house together. One evening, the 96 year old sister went upstairs to take a bath. As she put her foot into the tub, she paused. Then she yelled down to the other two sisters and asked, "Was I getting in the tub or out?"
"You dern fool," said the 94 year old. "I'll come up and see." When she got half way up the stairs she paused. "Was I going up the stairs or down?"
The 92 year old sister was sitting at the kitchen table drinking a cup of tea and thought, "I hope I never get that forgetful, knock on wood." She shook her head and called out, "I'll be up to help you both as soon as I see who's at the door."

[appaloosa]

Only in America....can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in America... do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our worthless junk in the garage.
Only in America... do we buy hot dogs in packages of 10 and hot dog buns in packages of 8.

[appaloosa]

A linguistics professor was lecturing his class one day.
'In English', he said, 'A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative.'
A loud voice from the back of the room piped up, 'Yeah, right.'